When I started learning about mindfulness meditation in my twenties, I was surrounded by like-minded people eager to make meditation a regular practice in their lives. After a few months of daily practice on my own, I went on a 10-day silent meditation retreat. For ten days I had only my meditation practice to focus on, mostly sitting, sometimes walking. I ate lovely vegetarian food and basked in the beauty of the mountain setting. The only distraction was internal – my wandering mind – but even that was part of the process. I learned invaluable lessons about myself during the retreat and I came home with a renewed sense of joy and connection.

Retreats are wonderful for this focused attention without the distractions of our day-to-day lives. That’s one reason they are such deep, meaningful experiences! Applying lessons learned into the “real” world is the challenge.

Fast forward over a decade, a marriage and two children later, and I certainly don’t have the same focus on meditation that I did then. For several years, the fact that I could not devote an hour a day to practice kept me from meditating at all. The years when my children were very young were also a time when I moved four times and to three different states. Finding time and energy for a meditation practice was not a priority.

As my work and home life settled into a more predictable rhythm, I felt the pull towards redeveloping my meditation practice. I knew that a consistent practice would help to keep me feeling whole and sane as I was challenged in parenting and work. My goals were to be more mindful in everyday life, to be connected with myself and others, and to practice with discipline. This time, I knew that an hour a day would not fit my life! So I started with a practice so short that I knew I could fit it into my busy day. I gave myself permission to practice for 1-5 minutes, but I wanted to do it every day. One minute! I could do that! I found that when I carved out only 5 minutes, I often kept practicing for longer. Sometimes I would focus on mindfulness several times throughout the day. And the days when I had no energy for a longer practice, I would close my eyes at my desk, center myself and breathe mindfully for a minute or two. Mindfulness and meditation practice began to weave fluidly through my daily life instead of being another item on the To-Do list.

Meditation is called a practice because it is the doing it minute-by-minute, day-by-day that matters. There is no endpoint where if we meditate a certain number of hours then we are good for life! I dream of someday attending another several day retreat. Days of silence and inward focus sounds delicious to this working mother. Until then I will do what I can and know that I am doing great.

Claire is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with expertise in body-oriented psychotherapy.  She works as a Behavioral Health/EAP Consultant, providing workplace consultations to employers and assessment and referrals to clients.