“Can We All Get Along?”
Rodney King, in appealing for calm during the Los Angeles riots, May 1. 1992
Over the last several months, media reports of violence due to political, civil, cultural and religious differences seem to be almost a daily occurrence. The psychological impact can wear down the most resilient mindset. As we work through each event, a range of normal emotions flow from shock to anger or fear. Eventually, as we search for some understanding and meaning, a final thought, emotion and behavior help to psychologically end the experience.
It’s normal to find a psychological resolution to what upsets us. The human brain normally works toward assigning a meaning to something seen as dangerous and upsetting so it can decide the importance of the event to our future survival behavior. When something is perceived as harmful, the fight or flight response, wired in for survival against a threat, turns into the behavior that we have been witnessing. However, in our emerging global society where diversity in culture, religion, skin color and other values may be more the norm, our primitive and automatic survival responses can be more harmful than helpful in a world moving toward increasing connectedness and interdependence.
Our mind and body can also become exhausted when faced with a steady stream of traumatizing events; leading to the belief that nothing can be done. When this occurs, a third survival response appears. Our mind shuts down, disconnection, resignation and passive acceptance sets in. It’s not a healthy response, but one that also ensures survival. What makes this unhealthy is that it moves us further from finding effective skills to constructively engage in the world we live in with all its diversity.
You may ask yourself, “What is it going to take for this to finally end?” There are no simple solutions. But on an individual level there is a tool that can provide an option besides our “wired” responses to the growing complexity of our world. If you find yourself left with a feeling of anger, fear, or hopelessness in response to the upsetting events you’ve been exposed to, remind yourself that even as one person you can make a positive difference; by seeking a deeper understanding of violence through Mindfulness. Mindfulness research shows that establishing an “observing witness” is detachment with a healthy difference: purposeful change to effectively manage the moment. Mindfulness is a therapeutic practice that allows the practitioner to rise above primitive reaction, to thoughtful action. The result of Mindfulness practice can be a different internal orientation that leads to a constructive rather than destructive outcome to differences we encounter in our life space. Developing and using Mindfulness skills can dissolve the fear the gets in the way of reaching across the cubicle, the aisle or border to experience differences, not as something to fear, but accept.
Take some time to search the internet for more information on Mindfulness. Your employee assistance program also offers additional tools and resources. It may lead you to finding a healthy and constructive answer to the question, “Can we all get along?”
Thomas Edgar, MSW, MHS, LCSW is an Anthem Care Manager assigned to the Behavioral Health Resource Center and EAP. His professional experience includes private practice in behavioral health and extensive experience in the development and delivery of employee assistance programs and services to business and industry.